Watch Your Direction
The pandemic has provided extra time to ponder and ruminate about life. While it is generally helpful to reflect upon your journey, I’ve had a few conversations with people who are struggling with ongoing psychological pain because of past failings. If that describes you, I hope this helps.
How are you?
You say you are fine, but something is bothering you. I can tell. What is it? What’s wrong?
What you aren’t saying speaks volumes. I understand life can feel difficult and everyone goes through tough times, but it seems you are carrying the weight of the world beneath that stoic veneer. Let me remind you of something forgotten. You are wonderful just as you are!
You seem uncomfortable with that statement. You are your harshest critic. Do you really believe you can beat yourself into being a better person? It doesn’t work that way. While you are certainly sincere in your suffering, can you recognize constant preoccupation with negativity as unhealthy? Disturbing thoughts only have life when you give them presence, so be mindful of where you place the focus of your attention.
There comes a point where the voices of the past have nothing new to tell you. You can’t unscramble eggs. It’s time to move on. If you are feeling bad about old mistakes, aspire to the lesson learned. You’ve grown through so much to become a wiser version of yourself. Those difficulties are the cost you paid for this new version of you. Perhaps the challenge is to recognize and acknowledge all your mistakes as part of you and part of your journey.
The truth is you need to love yourself, all of yourself, just as you are or you will forever be chasing someone or something to fill that void. Be aware of where you are placing your interest and energy. Is it really where you want to go?
Time is so precious. Please don’t waste it ruminating about a past you cannot change.