Debt Can - But Doesn't Have to - Ruin a Marriage

As more Americans than ever before willingly marry into debt, financial problems are among the top reasons reported as the cause of divorce.

“It’s well documented that finances can significantly strain a relationship,” Mike Losneck, CEO of Eaton Family Credit Union, said.

Losneck said an Ohio Credit Union League 2019 consumer survey found 38 percent of Ohioans said finances have been a main cause of stress in their romantic relationship.

The scientific journal, “Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice,” found 50 percent of divorced couples interviewed listed financial problems as a major factor contributing to their divorce. That puts financial problems third on a list of 11 contributing factors, only behind “too much fighting” and a “lack of commitment.”

Another study by Ramsey Solutions found couples struggling with debt have a higher propensity to argue about money than those who aren’t.

According to Ramsey’s study, 41 percent of couples who have consumer debt say most of their arguments center around money, Losneck said. “By comparison, 25 percent of couples who are debt-free say they argue about financial matters. In fact, money doesn’t make the top-five list of things in which debt-free couples argue.”

The Credit Union League’s survey also found an increasing number of American couples are beginning their marriages in debt and doing it, willingly.

Losneck said the survey found 57 percent of Ohioans believe finances should be combined when a couple marries which leads to more income and assets, but also more debt.

The Ramsey study found 86 percent of couples married five years or less reported starting their marital lives with debt. That’s compared to only 43 percent of couples married more than 25 years ago.

However, there’s good news for couples living in the Buckeye state, Losneck said. According to a Value Penguin study, the average Ohio household has only $5,446 of credit card debt, the least of any state. 

The Ohio Credit Union League offers these tips to living financially happily ever after:

Understand your partner’s finances. If you’re combining money with a significant other, it’s important to make sure you’ve aligned the goals you have for money. Take time to thoroughly discuss each other’s finances and talk about how those finances could be combined harmoniously.

Set financial goals for the household. When your finances are aligned, it’s important your goals are, too. Make sure you and your partner agree upon and understand what you’re working toward in the short and long term. It’s just as important to discuss what you want from retirement as it is to understand whether you’re saving for a new car or a big vacation in the next couple of years.

Set a recurring money date. Finances can change overtime which is why it’s important to maintain a regular household budget. It’s OK if either you or your partner is more involved in keeping up the budget, but it’s important the other member of the couple remains consistently involved. A recurring “money date” where both members of a couple can examine, discuss and contribute to the budget helps each of you stay on the same page.

Remain 100 percent transparent. It’s important never to hide financial matters from your spouse. Be completely honest about any financial transactions, debt or savings. Money is a tool to bring you toward your future goals - a journey you’re on together. 

Seek help. Keeping finances on track can be hard enough for a single person. Once you add the spending habits, beliefs and debts of another, you create a more complicated financial scenario. Don’t be afraid to seek professional help. Visit your local credit union from experienced employees and educational workshops designed to aid with your financial endeavors.